Anxiety flees…Peace arrives

My head rested comfortably on my special “flight pillow” as the plane ascended. Here I am, once again on a flight back to the USA.

A few years ago, I would’ve jumped with joy at the chance to take a trip back home. Its funny how I’ve changed. Now, a trip back home is flying back to the Dominican Republic and driving up my mountain. Yes, HOPE Mountain is home to me these days.

Anxiety holds me tight as I freeze under a blanket and wrapped in my grandmother’s sweater. I can’t relax, even though I got no sleep last night. Just worry. Fear. Wonder of what happens tomorrow.

I’ve known for years that my legal immigration status in the Dominican Republic needed to be corrected. So many of us foreigners lived without worry because we knew that we could just pay a tax when leaving, thus the process of becoming a resident didn’t weigh us down. My situation was even better. As a missionary, I was exempt from that tax, so I could stay there as long as I wanted without a worry.

But like an unwanted rodent in the night, the law changed. It changed and we weren’t even notified! We found out when it seemed to be too late.

So now, here I go, back to the USA to work out our Dominican residency issues. Away from home. The DR law requires us to obtain our Dominican residency in our country of citizenship. I have to work out these immigration issues at a Dominican consulate in the states.

It seems so not right. So untimely. So unfortunate. 

The ladies on my mountain were finally opening up to me. Our churches are finally seeing the numeric and the spiritual growth we’ve longed to see. We are experiencing salvations and baptisms almost every week!

Our property is as peaceful as ever. Our children centers have the order we’ve longed for and HOPE sings in the air! All while I’m sitting on an airplane!

My heart cries for the our ministry in the DR, not for DR consul in DC!

And the anxiety! It won’t let me go. I prayed all day yesterday-even throughout the night. Why so much fear?

Perhaps I’m afraid of our supporters. What will they think of me when they see me in the states once again? Why does that thought make me tense?

Perhaps the ladies won’t open up any more? Or the churches will become desolate or the property may turn into a non-cared for jungle again or the centers will become chaotic or HOPE’s melody will cease.

Oh, and there is always a need for money! Children won’t eat at the centers if there is no money. Our teacher’s won’t get paid without money. The church’s rent, the musicians, the projects, nothing would happen without money!

I can’t understand. Worry is really trying its best to grip me.

I’ve begun a new prayer journey. My prayers have become more direct and written out with scriptures attached. They’ve been effective. Straight forward. Hitting its target. Serious. Forceful. Meaningful. That’s what my prayers have been lately.

Perhaps the anxiety, fear and worry is a counter attack.

Perhaps the enemy wants me to focus on my false reality and not on my true reality, who is a Person, Christ Jesus!

So, to remain consistent with my prayer journey, I pray, “Why so downcast Oh my soul, put your HOPE in God. And Do not gloat over me, my enemies! For though I fall, I will rise again. Though I sit in darkness, the Lord will be my light.” I fight back and I win.

My hope rests in my God.

He drew the ladies, not me.

He grew the churches, not me.

He brought the order to the centers, not me.

He brought the tranquility and peace, He is the HOPE that is proclaimed in the atmosphere, not me.

And He provides, not humans. He has never, ever let me down. He won’t stop now.

So I choose to fear Him, not man. Not any man.

He sees my insanity and He provides clear direction. He forgives my iniquities. He is full of grace. His grace is poured out upon me now.

So, I’ll drink my watered down American coffee on this flight; just to keep warm. I’ll snuggle up in my grandmother’s sweater and blanket and lay my weary head on my pillow. He knows what tomorrow holds. My life and HOPE Dominican Republic is in His loving and faithful hands.

Published by Vicki Dominguez

As a believer of Jesus Christ, I purpose to follow Him into the darkest places so that His light can shine the brightest. I'm on a mission to shine His light to all who cross my path.

One thought on “Anxiety flees…Peace arrives

  1. Pastor Vicki, Be at peace! God has you, your family and the DR.

    1 He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. 2 I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” 3 Surely he will save you from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence. 4 He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. 5 You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, 6 nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday. 7 A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you. 8 You will only observe with your eyes and see the punishment of the wicked. 9 If you make the Most High your dwelling– even the LORD, who is my refuge– 10 then no harm will befall you, no disaster will come near your tent. 11 For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; 12 they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone. 13 You will tread upon the lion and the cobra; you will trample the great lion and the serpent. 14 “Because he loves me,” says the LORD, “I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. 15 He will call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. 16 With long life will I satisfy him and show him my salvation.”
    Psalm 91 NIV

    Sister Frieda

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